No matter what, someone will always have something to say about your choices, so either way, walk your way and be happy...

Often times we live our lives struggling with concern about what people--our families, friends, society, and church, co-workers, neighbors--will say about our choices. We want to feel worthy, loved and wholly accepted and so we operate from an external concern of what others will opine versus what our internal know will accept. Many times we end up, sadly, shortchanging our dreams. Whether we do so with our sexuality, choice of partners, career, college preferences, or as silly enough, what we have for breakfast or our fashion picks, we stay in situations we have no business being in, eat things we don;t really like and wear pearls, even though we love hoops. We says yes when we really want to say no. We say agree situations that we know are not internally congruent with our hearts. And all of these choices, the little ones and big ones, that go against our internal know, do affect us. We slowly burn inside, like little lights being turned off--our energy is depleted, our spirits go dark inside. This way of living turns into dis-ease not just with our bodies but our minds and hearts. Not being at ease inside turns into something ugly. In Spanish this notion is called, "el que dirán..." Living with the super sized concern of what others will opine about our choices.

If you are struggling with this, know one thing: "people have something nasty to say about everyone," including Mother Theresa. One of my mom's favorite sayings: la gente siempre mira la paja de ajena y no la propia. People will always look through someone else's garbage and not their own.

Several years ago, I came across this amazing passage by poet and historian Jennifer Michael Hecht: "Either life means something or it means nothing. Either way you need to relax to get through the panic and get in on the game. Most of all--if you can remind yourself--in stable and unstable times, that change is the nature of things you will rise and be able to help others. ( I add, help yourself!)  It goes on: "Only don't think that if you are perfectly generous and kind and wise you will escape the derision of humanity. People have something nasty to say about everyone". Even Mother Theresa.

We owe it to ourselves to live life with grace, always remembering to honor our internal intuition.